This site is obviously dedicated to those moments I catch myself in "over-thought". So I'll leave my thoughts as generic and applicable to most situations as possible.
Sometimes the difference between success is how you approach the situation at hand. No matter how sticky and how bad the circumstances may be, being cautious not to strike the wrong chord or speak the wrong words make all the difference in resolving an issue.
I suppose it appears common sense to most to be cautious with wordchoice when the situation is delicate and could easily rupture someone's ego. The tone and wordchoice dictate the difference between whether a thought is carried out as an attack or if you are handling it a rational matter instead.
EH noted in regards to my 'I swear to god we'll be alright if you put your weapon down' status message, that "when two people are hostile the argument gets no where, when one person is hostile the other person caves due to aggression...overall it may build resentment".
Using a careful approach, generally with words, and portrayal of tone, are keys to conquering any situation, no matter how difficult.
Peace and harmony versus rage and aggression. It's an obvious no-brainer which team wins.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Control Freak
I think no matter how hard I've tried to convince myself that letting go of the control is critical in achieving happiness, I've "held on" to many things that I know are out of my control.
But today I was shown once AGAIN, the true meaning of letting go of control. By example, I was shown through an email just how simple it really is.
IM put it like this: it doesn't mean if someone else feels bad because of you that it is your duty to feel guilt for it. You simply address the issue, and clarify what the intention was. And then you leave it at that, whereas I would have assumed responsbility for causing the negative feeling.
I realized that it doesn't mean if someone feels bad that you should immediately try to take it in your hands and control the outcome of how they feel. Sometimes it really is out of our control. By changing your action you may or may have not had an impact on the person.
We have no control over someone else's feelings and if it really isn't something you intended, then standing your ground to understand and clarify for the "supposed victim" is all you can really do. It's once you back down and doubt yourself that the trouble starts.
But today I was shown once AGAIN, the true meaning of letting go of control. By example, I was shown through an email just how simple it really is.
IM put it like this: it doesn't mean if someone else feels bad because of you that it is your duty to feel guilt for it. You simply address the issue, and clarify what the intention was. And then you leave it at that, whereas I would have assumed responsbility for causing the negative feeling.
I realized that it doesn't mean if someone feels bad that you should immediately try to take it in your hands and control the outcome of how they feel. Sometimes it really is out of our control. By changing your action you may or may have not had an impact on the person.
We have no control over someone else's feelings and if it really isn't something you intended, then standing your ground to understand and clarify for the "supposed victim" is all you can really do. It's once you back down and doubt yourself that the trouble starts.
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